The anatomy of a two-person connection in which either extreme—great harmony or absolute discord—prevails isn’t a mystery to me.
I realize my views are controversial, but I simply report the results of my empirical research. My long-term findings show the way things are between two people is a natural, unique condition that can’t be altered.
It fascinates me to delve into the fundamentals of a congenial business partnership or personal relationship, or the opposite, one with incessant conflict.
Time and time again, the extremes in the comprehensive patterns of my systems of analysis are striking, imitating life.
Taking the advice, “just try to get along,” ultimately won’t make much of a difference, just as thinking warm thoughts won’t allow you to avoid frostbite.
The following considerations are often cited for the level of harmony between two people, but in reality it’s more about their innate compatibility.
- Problematic subconscious fears and defenses including personality red flags such as stubbornness, excessive bias, dishonesty, vanity, jealousy, irrationality, and resentment make a connection between you and another person worse, but they are separate from the unique, innate level of harmony.
- While tact, modesty, sincerity, objectivity, dependability, emotional maturity, discretion, and other admirable qualities serve to enhance partnerships, both partners having these qualities in excess and lacking red flag personality traits still won’t override a horrendous, inherent bond.
- The destructive and remorseless behavior of a sociopath is unconnected to your inborn connection with her.
- Having similar values and interests have nothing to do with the actual, natural level of harmony between you and other person.
- Having the same sort of background has nothing to do with the innate compatibility between two people.
The real reason you click with another person is because the unique, measurable energy is simply amiable.
Whether you’re, “willing to work at it,” or not is immaterial.
Authentic compatibility is not a choice, it’s unvarying and endures forever, and each two-person connection is different.
Copyright © 2016 Scott Petullo