Quickly identifying someone’s core personality traits isn’t easy, even for the shrewdest judge of character. But there’s a way to quickly get an idea of a person’s character.
According to a study referred to in this article, asking someone’s opinion about other people exposes a lot about their own personality. “The more positively they judged those people, the more happy, enthusiastic, capable and emotionally stable they turned out to be themselves…those who judged others more negatively had higher levels of narcissism and antisocial behaviour.”
You may have witnessed this phenomenon yourself; people, particularly those who lack self-awareness, tend to project their personality traits onto others.
As the old saying goes, you don’t see the world as it is, you see it as you are.
Next time you meet someone and you want to get to know the person better, ask his or her opinion of someone. A polarizing figure such as a troubled celebrity would make for a good topic of focus.
But make sure to avoid projecting your own stuff onto your new acquaintance–remain detached and avoid judgment to get the most accurate insight. Also make sure to acknowledge that being objective and honest about a miscreant who wronged someone, for example, is different.
Single out specific personality traits too, particularly if you believe the person may possess that trait. Ask if she thinks someone is duplicitous, for instance. However, the risk is that she may be clever enough to realize what you’re doing and may smoothly manipulate you to make herself appear to your liking.
Also watch their body language, which can be a very effective form of personality analysis. Spotting non-verbal cues that contrast with what the person is telling you can be very amusing (and alarming).
Although it’s tough to get to know someone’s authentic personality in a brief span of time without various forms of security investigations, you may be able to get an idea through asking the right questions.
Copyright © 2016 Scott Petullo